The Sweet Spot

I love the next two weeks. We cut down our tree this weekend and decorated the house. The purple house is now twinkling with white lights, the advent calendar will open it's first door tomorrow and the stockings have been hung over the fireplace. Seeing the tree as I walk down the steps each morning makes me smile.

The next two weeks will be spent making lists, going to small town tree lightings, listening to little a little girl's chorus sing holiday songs, eating candy canes and making more lists. I won't start feeling the pressure of Christmas approaching yet, I won't be tired of Christmas music yet, the tree won't start losing needles and the smell of peppermint will still give me small burst of energy.

Yes, I will enjoy the next two weeks.

So NaBloPoMo is over and I only skipped one day. I bet you didn't even notice that I didn't post last Monday. Some posts I'm proud of and some were most definitely just phoning it in. I'm glad I did it and it served it's purpose for me. I'm inspired to start writing more. But I need a short break. And a nap.

Sunday's Simple Pleasures XVII

This has been happening more and more lately and it makes me so happy. She is definitely turing into a book worm and she loves reading to her brother.

*I started Sunday's Simple Pleasures to highlight the simple things in my life that bring me joy. I believe one of the keys to overall happiness is learning to appreciate little things that bring you comfort and delight. You can see my entire list so far here.

Not Scrambled Eggs

Here's a list of kid-type foods that my kids don't care for:

• Peanut Butter and Jelly or any kind of sandwich
• Tuna Fish
• Scrambled Eggs
• Quesadillas
• Ketchup
• Cereal
• String Cheese
• Raisins

Now here are some not necessarily kid-type foods that my kids will eat:

• Chicken Curry
• Guacamole
• Onions
• Salad
• Capers
• Soups and Stews
• Brussels Sprouts

None of these things are really a problem for me. I was still am sort of a picky eater and I understand just not liking something that most of your peers think is delicious. Try living in California and despising sushi for example.

But the one that really gets me is scrambled eggs. It would make my life so much easier if I could whip up a pan of scrambled eggs, sprinkle in a little cheese and divide it up in the morning. But oh no, my kids like their eggs fancy. I make this recipe for herbed-baked eggs quite often. It's not too labor intensive if you chop the herbs the night before. The biggest issue when serving this to kids is waiting for it to cool down enough for them to eat. But if you're looking for something more to please both the little people and the adults, give it a try!

Note: this was my husband's breakfast. We don't give our kids coffee or large vitamins that must be swallowed. They prefer Indian Chai and Gummies with calcium.

Herbed-Baked Eggs

• 1/4 tsp fresh minced garlic
• 1/4 tsp fresh minded thyme leaves
• 1/4 tsp fresh minded rosemary leaves
• 1 Tablespoon fresh minced parsley
• 1 Tablespoon grated parmesan cheese
• 6 egg whites
• 2 Tablespoons of half-and-half (or any type of milk you have in your fridge works fine, but heavy cream or half-and-half makes these eggs really special)
• 1 Tablespoon unsalted butter
• Kosher salt and pepper to taste

Preheat the broiler and place the rack about 6 inches below the heat. Combine the garlic, thyme, rosemary, parsley, salt & pepper, and parmesan in a dish and set aside. Crack and separate the eggs, save the egg whites in a bowl and set aside.

Now sometimes I make this in a 1.5 quart casserole dish and we just cut it up and serve. You can also make it in smaller ramekins. If I'm using the size shown above in the photos, I use two or three egg whites per dish. If I'm using the smallest size ramekin, I use one or two egg whites per dish.

Place the ramekins or casserole dish on a baking sheet. If using separate dishes, divide the butter and milk evenly between them, or put the whole amount in the casserole if doing it that way. Place the baking sheet with the dished under the broiler for about 2 minutes or until the butter and milk starts to bubble.

Take them out and divide the egg whites among the dishes. Evenly sprinkle the herb/parmesan mixture on top and place back under the broiler until cooked, about 7-8 minutes depending on your oven. Let them cool for at least a minute or two before serving.

This recipe is adapted from Ina Garten's Herbed-Baked Eggs. We don't eat egg yolks, so I've never actually tried it her way.

Happy Thanksgiving

Here's what the little people are thankful for today.

Sejal, age 7

• That we have a house
• My bunnies
• My mom and dad
• My brother and sister
• My lamby (stuffed animal)
• My teacher

Raj, age 4

• Apples
• My wonderful mom (his words)
• My preschool
• My bed
• Sejal and Jayne
• Playing football with my dad

Jayne, age 7

• That we have a house
• My bunnies
• My mom and dad
• My friends
• Apple pie

And the big people...

Me

• Diet Pepsi
• My book light (it's that awesome)
• Trader Joe's
• Sourdough bread
• A hot cup of coffee in the morning
• A glass of wine at the end of the day
• That the thing my son is most looking forward to today is playing football with his dad
• Family movie night
• That my daughters read books to their little brother
• That my husband is a better cook than I am

Jay

• A healthy family
• A wife that always has a hot meal for me at the end of the day (I know, so '50's)
• A house that is almost complete
• Hopefully getting a bonus this year
• A son that loves sports as much as I do
• Daughters that are athletic and just a little scrappy
• UCLA football

photo courtesy of Lori Paladino

May you end the day with a full belly and an overflowing heart.

The War on Clutter

I could spend the entire day picking up after my children: shoes under the table, cardboard bits from class project, library book on the mantle, party favors, backpacks, lip balms, change purses, socks, shin guards, ponytail holders, toy race cars, colored pencils, homework folder.

Who wants to spend their entire day moving items to their proper place? I do, however, shuffle the most offending items (backpack under the dining room table, for example) to their proper place. Why do I do this? Because sometimes I can't bear to order them around for the 276th time in 24 hours. Some would scoff, I suppose. Yes, children should learn to pick up after themselves. But also, children should not only be spoken to in an unbroken string of do-this and do-that and don't-do-this and don't-do-that. Sometimes I just need to let them be.

To Do or Not To Do

*Updated below

This is hard. This blogging every day for 30 days is hard. A giant thank you to anyone who had read all these posts. Clearly, they are not all compelling reading. And this one will be no exception I'm afraid.

I am posting my to do list for tomorrow in the hopes that if it is written here in a public forum, I will be more likely to actually get some of it done.

• Wake up and get dressed Done
• Get the kids fed, dressed and ready for school Done
• Put turkey in the brine solution Almost done, waiting for the solution to cool. This is done now. I do not like to handle raw meat, at all. I thought the giblets would be in a nice plastic bag that I could just throw away, but NO. They were just hanging out inside the turkey!!! I almost threw up all over our raw turkey. It was my worst nightmare. And "giblets" is an awfully cute word for something so gross.
• Take the girls to school for their four hour school day Done
• Take Raj with me to the grocery store for some last minute Thanksgiving stuff Done
• Take Raj to Trader Joe's for more Thanksgiving stuff I can't get at the grocery store Done
• Kick myself for waiting until the day before Thanksgiving to go to the grocery store and Trader Joe's, especially with my four year old in tow Done, several times
• Take Raj to the craft store for paper we need to make the Thanksgiving place cards Done, twice. The first store didn't have what I needed so we had to go to another store.
• Pick girls up from school Done, I was early even!
• Curse school for having a half day the day before Thanksgiving when I have so much to do Done
• Feed kids lunch (it's harder than it sounds) Done
• Make an apple pie with three kids who love to help Done and it looks fantastic. I will blog the recipe at some point.
• Sit down with the kids and make the place cards Never happened today, we'll have to do it tomorrow.
• Find something to occupy the kids so I can do some more food prep Done
• Clean the seriously over-cluttered house and fold some laundry Done, except for the folding laundry part, not sure if that will get done today.
• Pile the kids in the car and head to the video store for DVD's for family movie night My husband came home early (hooray!!) and took the kids to the video store and for smoothies so I could accomplish the de-cluttering of the house without the kids re-cluttering.
• Go to our other house and pick up all our Christmas decoration that are packed away in the garage Done with the help of my husband
• Go to the pet store and buy bunny food Done
• Clean the bunny cage Done
• Maybe, possibly, try to go for a quick run on the treadmill *sigh* I'll try to go for a run tomorrow morning
• Order a pizza Done and it was delicious
• Bathe children Done
• Feed them pizza while they watch a movie Done
• Write a blog post
• Go to bed

That is 26 items. I'll let you know how many of these items I actually accomplish. Last year, I had no idea the kids got out of school before lunch and they were the last kids left when the secretary finally called me to come get them. And you better believe they still talk about that one day mom forgot to pick them up.

*It's 10:45am and I have completed the items above highlighted in red. Now I've got to go put the groceries away and pick up the girls.

*It is now 2:15pm and I have made a bigger dent in my to do list as noted above in blue. Still a long way to go...

It's 6:30pm and I've accomplished quite a bit today. The last few hours accomplishments are in green. Hooray for me. The kid are watching Up, my house smells like apple pie and cinnamon, the cranberries are cooling on the stove. I am going to put the stuffing together and maybe saute the carrots and parsnips if I have the energy.

Even More High Crimes

Just as I was mulling over what to write about tonight, my husband walked in with the mail. Amongst the zillions of catalogs and bills was out little towns quarterly newsletter. Hooray! The cover story was about a fire that almost destroyed the town in 1972, some very old sewer pipes are being replaced and there is apparently some hullabaloo about reducing town employee costs. Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Of course, I skipped all the above in favor of the police blotter. It never fails to disappoint. You can read earlier happenings in my little town here and here. This issue was not nearly as juice as the past two. There were a few drunk driving arrests, but these three seemed the most worthy of pointing out.

• At midnight one evening, HPD officers responded to the area of ABC Street and XYZ street on a repot of a female walking in the area wearing only a bikini. Upon arrival, the officers determined that the subject wearing the bikini was a male and was in need of psychiatric care.
• A resident dialed 9-1-1 because he believed someone was swimming in his pool at night. Responding officers determined that raccoons were the suspects in this case.
• Officers responded to a report of a large juvenile party with alcohol involved on C Street. Further investigation revealed that adults at the party were allowing under-age drinking. The party was shut down by HPD and a report was forwarded to the SM County District Attorney's office for prosecution of some of the adults for contributing to the delinquency of minors.

Exciting stuff going on here in suburbia I tell you.

Sunday's Simple Pleasures XVI: Representin'

Raj attends a great preschool. They have a nice array of preschool activities--cooking, gardening, riding around on trikes like maniacs, crafty things, and art. The art includes painting, drawing, stamping, as well as other things I'd never want to clean up after. I noticed last year (when Raj was three) that some of the kids his age were already drawing fairly detailed pictures. Pictures you could look at and figure out what they were: "ah, a mermaid." or "oh, that's a house." I also observed that many--not all--of the artists were girls.

Well, now at age four we finally have representational drawing happening at school and at home. I love watching him draw and I love the results. They could be any child's drawings. But I can't help but smile every time I walk past his purple turkey.

And I bet you can't guess what this one is:

If you guessed UCLA football game, you are correct. It is clearly the most awesome picture ever drawn by a four year old.

So simple, yet that turkey makes my heart swell.

*I started Sunday's Simple Pleasures to highlight the simple things in my life that bring me joy. I believe one of the keys to overall happiness is learning to appreciate little things that bring you comfort and delight. You can see my entire list so far here.

So Close

Every Thursday after preschool, I drive 20 minutes south down the freeway with my son in the back seat. My destination? My in-laws house. I then have some lunch and drive back up the freeway to pick up my girls... without my son in the back seat. Sometimes I pick him up the next day, but usually we pick him up sometime on Saturday.

It's good for everyone. He is treated like the prince that he is while he's there with no big sisters to push him around. The girls get a chance to do their homework without their noisy little brother around. But best of all, I get all day on Friday while the girls are at school to do things like clean the house, catch up on laundry, go to the dentist or sit on the couch all day and read my book if I feel like it.

I miss him while he's there and it always feels like something is missing on Fridays. But then I see the relationship my son has developed with my in-laws by spending so much time with them and I know it's a good thing. I am truly lucky to live so close to my husband's parents. They often will take all three of my kids overnight.

It's been a long time since they've had all three of them though having just returned from a month in London. So this afternoon when we went down to pick up Raj, I thought maybe we'd leave them there for the night. Which would mean I could sleep past 6:30am. Oh what I would give to sleep past 6:30am for just one day.

But as luck would have it, I left Sejal's lamby at home. She absolutely can not sleep without her lamby. She tried to be brave. I knew if I left her their without it things would not be easy for my mother-in-law. So Jayne ended up staying and Raj and Sejal came home.

I was one lamby away from being able to sleep in. So close. Maybe next weekend.

Deep Fried Turkey, Stickers & Pretty Paper, Apple Pie and You

I need your help internet. I have a few Thanksgiving questions and I just know you all have nothing better to do this weekend than help me out. It's not like any of you will be seeing that teen vampire movie thing. If you are planning on seeing that teen vampire movie thing, don't tell me about it. I have zero interest in anything vampire related. Zero.

So now that I no longer have a migraine thanks to a prescription for Imitrex, I am full on in Thanksgiving mode. My sister is hosting and I could not be more excited. Her house always looks lovely, warm and cozy. See...

Thanksgiving 2008

To be honest, Thanksgiving 2002 to 2006 kind of sucked. We had five kids under the age of 5 running around for those years. There was always someone who had the flu or a cold. The kids weren't able to sit for longer than five seconds and got cranky around 7pm. I'm not sure why we didn't outsource most of the cooking during those years. I don't think I sat down for longer than ten seconds or ate without a child on my lap. There were also several cooking mishaps during those years. Several. Maybe my sister will write about those since they involve her kitchen.

Things started to get better around 2007 and have improved markedly since then. We finally wised up and realized everyone was much happier if we fed the kids first then put on a movie for them while the adults ate. Um, duh! Why we didn't think of this earlier I have no idea. As our kids get older, they are also quite happy to lock themselves in the playroom and don't really need us for anything other than food anyway. It's blissful.

So here are my questions:

1. We've deep fried our turkey for the past few years and it's worked out really well. Nothing has caught fire, the turkey cooks pretty quickly and is moist and yummy. This year I want to try to brine it before hand. Can you deep fry a brined turkey? I would think so, it seems like a silly question. Anyone?

2. My kids like to make place cards for the table. For the past two years they've just traced their little hands, cut them out and written the names on the little turkeys. Voila. But I'm kind of over that project and I think we're ready for something more. Any ideas?? Here's what I bought at the craft store with no particular project in mind.

Stickers and pretty paper. I was thinking of making these little boats, but the pretty paper I bought is not double sided. And I must be paper folding challenged, because I can not figure out the instructions and my boat looks more like a raft. What else can I do the pretty paper and stickers besides cut out turkey hands?

3. Lastly, I have made several attempts to make an apple pie over the years. Each time I have failed. Miserably. I might attempt it again this year, but I need a kick @ss apple pie recipe. Anyone have one to share?? (Don't worry Kari, I will test it out before I bring it to your house and make you sample it)

I'm counting on you internet. Don't fail me.

Buzzing

There are several things buzzing in my house right now: the washing machine, the dishwasher, the heater buzzes on and off. But the loudest thing in my house right now is my husband. He is on the couch snoring so loud that I can barely hear all the other appliances. I literally yelled him name and he barely flinched. I can't hear the TV. I can't concentrate enough to write anything.

I've had a headache for the past 24 hours or so. I have attended a mother's club board meeting, got my kid's ready for school, had lunch with four second graders while we discussed Toys Go Out for the South H Elementary book club, walked through my house to review paint colors, helped my girls finish their homework, drove the girls to hip-hop/jazz dance class and met some friends for dinner at a cute little Mexican restaurant all while it felt like someone had my head in a vice. The nausea comes and goes and light and loud noises are almost unbearable at times.

So this is the best I can do tonight. I am leaving my snoring husband on the couch and taking myself and my headache to bed.

Community

It's a funny thing, this blogging stuff. I'm emotionally connected to so many people that I have never met in real life. Issa, Jill, Laura, Susie, Christy, Denise and Kate are just a few of the people that I just know I would having coffee with on a regular basis if we lived in the same state. I can think of five, six, seven more off the top of my head. Then there's Maura, who shares my love of ice cream cake and brought one over to my house one night. True story.

I read their stories and I care about what happens to them. It's a difficult thing to explain to someone who doesn't share their thoughts in this sort of forum. I can see how some people would think this whole thing is strange.

There are a million blogs out there, and yet sometimes the blogosphere can seem so small. It's like a small town community. Especially if you spend any time at all on Twitter, so many names and faces flash across your screen and become people you "know."

This past spring when Heather and Mike Spohr lost their daughter I watched as this community rallied to support her. I had never met Heather or Mike, but I did read her blog. I was shaken and felt compelled to do something even though Maddie was just a cute little girl whose picture flashed on my computer screen occasionally.

Now I've sat back and watched again as this community rallies to support another family in need. I have never met Anissa and have only read a few of her posts. I don't have a funny story of how I met her at a conference or anything like that. I do remember her from the humor panel I attended at BlogHer and I have a feeling I am missing out by not knowing her. But that does not mean I don't feel emotionally connected to her story. You can read more about what happened here as well as how to help.

Yes, it's a funny thing, this blogging stuff. Sharing your stories and your heart on-line is not for everyone. But I've seen some amazing things happen in this community of keyboard tappers. And I am happy to be a teeny, tiny little part of it.

A Hairy Tale

Once there were two sisters, born on the same day, to the same mom. Twins. Double Trouble. Double Blessing.

They shared a crib. They shared a wardrobe. They shared pacifiers. They shared most everything. They always the same haircut, parted on different sides.

One day they gave bangs a try.

Eventually they tired of the bangs and decided to grow them out. Together.

Same haircut, parted on different sides.

Then one day one of the girls said she wanted short hair.

"No!" said her mother.

"I don't want short hair! How will people know we are sisters!?" said the other girl.

But she insisted, she knew she what she wanted. And so.

It was a good thing. Smiles all around, even from their mother. Little by little the girls are convincing their mother that different is good.

I suppose it's time to let them have separate underwear drawers too. Sigh.

Beautiful Mistakes

This past summer during our annual trip to Bass Lake, we took a day trip into Yosemite. If you've never been to Yosemite, let me just tell you you're missing out. Even the famous Ansel Adams photos don't really compare to seeing it in person. Sorry Ansel.

While the valley floor is gorgeous, I happen to believe anything really worth seeing in Yosemite you have to hike to. The first time we took the kids to Yosemite, we hiked to Bridalveil Falls. I use the term hike very loosely here. Bridalveil Falls is not really a true hike. It probably took us 10 minutes to reach the falls. The waterfall was more of a trickle that year thanks to a pretty anemic year of rainfall. This year we wanted something more. My kids are used to long walks/hikes, but even I was skeptical when my husband suggested we try the Mist Trail.

Jay and I hiked this trail years ago. We went a little bit beyond Nevada Falls and it took us the better part of a day. On a scale of 1-10, 1 being a stroll in the park and 10 being a 30 mile hike straight uphill, I would say it's about a five. It's a steep climb, but the views are amazing. Of course, we knew the kids wouldn't make it the seven mile round trip to Nevada Falls, but we thought we'd try the 3 mile round trip hike to Vernal Falls.

It was hot, August day. There was some a lot of whining along the way and we took tons of water/snack breaks. But we made it. I was so incredibly proud of my kids. They encouraged each other along the way and took turns with the walking stick we found at the beginning of the trail.

They were amazed by the waterfalls and so proud of themselves. "Wasn't it worth it?" I asked. It was a lovely Norwindian family moment and we rewarded ourselves with huge ice cream cones when we made it back down. I wish I had a photo of us at Vernal Falls, but they kids were wiped out and this was the best I could do.

Seriously. This is what most of photos look like.

Lovely, no? Notice how the falls aren't even in the background? But we were really happy, I swear. This is what the falls look like if you're interested.

I've been thinking a lot lately about that hike and the lesson it taught us.

Recently I walked into my daughter's classroom to pick her up for a dentist appointment and I noticed she looked like someone had just told her that her bunny died. As soon as she caught sight of me, she started to cry. It was only much later that she told me the little girl who sits next to her (who happens to be a bit of a bully), told her that she was stupid for not knowing some math thing because it was sooooo easy. My first instinct was to ask her teacher to move her to a new seat. But then I thought, what will that really teach her. Wouldn't it be better for me to teach her some snappy comebacks or how to soldier on when someone tells you that you can't do something?

The past weekend there was a lizard trapped between our screen door and sliding glass door. We took some pictures before setting the little fellow free and each of my daughters decided to write a little story about the lizard to share with their classmates. When they finished I told them both how fantastic and detailed I thought their stories were, but they would have to re-write them because their handwriting was terrible. One of them immediately started pouting and told me that I must not love her (her exact words). It took her hours to recover from the criticism. I only wish I was kidding. It was painful for both of us, but I can't stop telling her what I think only to save her feelings. How do I teach her that just because I tell her I know she can do better does not mean I don't love her?

Also this past weekend we decided to fire up the Wii. It's a been a while since we've played and the kids were beyond excited. One of my daughters was racing with my son on Mario Kart. The race started before she realized that she was the car at the top of the screen and not the one on the bottom. By the time she figured it out, my son was well on his way to smoking her. This did not go over well with the older sister. She threw her controller down and sat on the couch and sobbed. When that didn't get anyone's attention, she threw a blanket over the TV which stopped the game. Not cool. Sometimes the start of the race is unfair, but that does not mean you can sabotage the game for everyone else.

I normally pick my son up from preschool at 11:45am. On Mondays I need him to stay at school for lunch bunch since I am in my daughter's classroom until 12pm. He has always disliked lunch bunch. In the past I've not really made him go. If I couldn't make it to pick him up I'd arrange for a play date or have my mom pick him up and take him out to lunch. But this year I figured there is no reason why he can't stay at school for lunch bunch. He will be starting kindergarten next year and will have to be at school for lunch every day, so he may as well get used to it. So far he's had a mixed reaction to me putting my foot down about lunch bunch. But today he did not want to stay at all. I fought the urge to call my mom, and just matter-of-factly told him he was staying and that was that. He then told me he would not be eating his lunch. Sure enough, when I picked him up he had barely touched his lunch, but devoured it as soon as we got home.

What does all this have to do with our hike? Well, I believe in teaching my kids early that life is not always easy and comfortable. But making it through the tough times and facing the uncomfortable-ness head on is what makes us stronger, better people. I've talked to them often since that hot, August day about how lucky they are they got to go on that hike. Yes, it was hard. But we were in it together and the view from the top was so worth it.

It seems strange to say this, but I want them to make mistakes, to endure a little disappointment or failure and really feel it. The more they learn to deal with it while they are seven, seven and yes, even four, the better prepared they will be later on.

I have to fight daily against my instinct to want to fix everything for them, to carefully arrange their lives so nothing is difficult or uncomfortable for them. Because I know in my heart that would be doing them a disservice. Sometimes we have to deal with a bully, take criticism, lose the race or do something we don't want to do. But it's those experiences that help us learn and grow, that make us who we are.

Of course I don't want their lives to be filled with obstacles. But I want them to learn that our mistakes and failures are a valuable part of life. I want them to know that there are things in life that are worth making sacrifices and working hard for. I don't want them to be afraid to tackle their troubles. I will always be here to pick them up when they need me and cheer them on when they think they can't make it through the rain.

There are times in life when the only way to experience true beauty, is to feel a little pain (hello childbirth!). And I will most certainly be with them to enjoy the view from the top of whatever mountain they choose to climb.

And I'm learning to be brave in my beautiful mistakes
Oh, I've felt that fire and I, I've been burned
But I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned
I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned

-Pink, Crystal Ball